(Brian Montgomery) You can take the kid out of Kosciusko, but you can’t take Kosciusko out of the kid.
My son Mason is currently serving aboard the USS Mason, and he had a busy week.
Most of our communication is through text messages.
Saturday morning at 03:00 was one of those times.
It was early, but time stands still when you’re a Navy dad. When your son is serving aboard a destroyer in the Strait of Hormoz , you answer the phone. It doesn’t matter what time it is.
During our conversations, Mason has introduced me to more Navy terminology than I ever expected to learn.
A gedunk is a vending machine or snack area. A scuttlebutt is a water fountain. A scuttle can be a hatch or opening aboard the ship.
Then there is the BMOW, which stands for Boatswain’s Mate of the Watch.
Somewhere between hearing that term and trying to understand everything else Mason was telling me, “BMO of the Watch” was born.
The real BMOW has an actual job and real responsibilities.
The BMO of the Watch does not.
He is an overly confident civilian who reports for duty without being asked, misunderstands nearly everything and reacts to ordinary shipboard life like the fate of the free world depends on him.
The episode also includes a few unofficial terms I’ve picked up along the way.
A flying fish is a water pigeon. A bird on land is a sand pigeon. Navy announcements are often repeated, which explains phrases like, “Now hear this, now hear this.”
There is also the call, “Sweepers, sweepers, man your brooms,” which tells sailors it is time to clean the ship fore and aft.
Naturally, the BMO of the Watch hears all of this and decides he is ready to take command.
What started as a conversation between a father in Kosciusko and his son aboard the USS Mason turned into a song, a group of cartoon characters and a story that probably got a little more out of hand than either of us expected.
But there is something behind all the silliness.
It means a lot to me to think that a sailor might come across it after a long day and laugh. Maybe a parent, spouse, child or friend will find it and send it to someone they love.
If it gives one of our sailors, or one of the people waiting for them back home, a reason to smile, then it was worth every pigeon, mop bucket and misunderstood Navy order.
The “BMO of the Watch” episode is available with this story.
On a desktop computer, you can find it to the right of the page. On a mobile device, it is located at the bottom of the story.
Now hear this, now hear this.
The BMO of the Watch is on duty.
—Brian “B-MO” Montgomery
